Relationships & Family

EXPECTATIONS & PERCEPTIONS

We all have expectations of what we want from others.  What do you want from a spouse, child, parent, co-worker, or friend?  What you are willing to give?  How do you want to be accepted?  Are your wants realistic?  Are you trying to hide behind unrealistic expectations and safeguards?  Are you willing to settle for too little and deny your true worth?

Ask the above questions about others.

When we find someone that sort of meets our expectations, we tend to lock in acceptance based on our first impressions and ignore the later revelations that do not fit.  We tell ourselves that we can either fix or ignore the differences.

We frequently see in others what we want to see and totally ignore reality along with his or her objections.  Have you ever heard: “He or she is so attractive.  If I could just win him or her over…?”  Too often, winning is losing!

When we are locked into a relationship, we are too often willing to over compromise and/or endure great abuse from the other person instead of admitting to failure in our judgment.  This is true with children, parents, friends, and associates as well as with marriages and romantic relationships.

Pretending that we are different from our realities, and that the other person is also different from his or her realities, is begging for failure. 

OPPORTUNITIES

Look at the conflicts between parents and children.  Try replacing the perceptions and expectations based on wishful thinking with more honest appraisals.  Take the time to learn how to communicate instead of just reacting.  Lose the phrase “I have no choice!”  Your odds for success should improve. 

If you give your essence up for a relationship with family, lover, or spouse, you bring nothing of value to that relationship.  If you allow the other side of a relationship to give up their identity to you, then they have nothing of value to bring to you.

With Viewpoint, you develop your personal potential so that you have more to offer, and you are better able to help others with their potentials.  In addition, your continuing personal growth makes you a dynamic partner instead of a wilting flower—certainly giving you more to offer.

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